I remember a time I used to meditate on my cushion and feel so wonderful and then I’d open my mouth to speak afterwards and out would come my conditioned language... the wonderful feelings from meditation would leave me and I’d be back struggling to self-advocate or connect with others about what really mattered.
The way I'd learned to communicate used a LOT of labels that had impacts I didn’t intend or understand.
Whether it was praise labels like “you’re amazing” or disapproving labels like “you’re being argumentative”...labels didn't support the sort of connection or mutual understanding I really wanted.
Now instead of saying ie; “You’re amazing” I might say “I really appreciate your work being done on time, I'm so much more reassured about this collaboration moving forward, thank you”. This lets my colleague know what they did that mattered to me and why. It's transparency that builds trust much faster than labels.